Ready to Begin Dating After Your Divorce

When you go through a divorce it feels like you are grieving a death and basically, that's precisely what you are doing. A divorce is the death of a marriage. It takes time to "get through it" and get the grief processed.

You need to grieve and go through the stages of grief. If you have been divorced awhile, you may be ready to start dating again. Before you start to take this important step, you need to do some evaluating.

To begin, assess how long your divorce has been final. What period of time has passed? Everyone's time frame for when it is appropriate for you to start dating will vary. The only people that you need to consider when making this decision are your children. I'm not saying that you need to ask their permission; they might not be accepting of the idea for a while. I'm just saying that it is your job to assess the situation.

How have they been acting? Do they ask you about finding some one new? How old are they? Are they youngsters who don't have a complete grasp on what has happened because of the divorce, or are they older children who do know? Second of all, you need to figure out your approach. If you do start dating, are you going to be open about it or keep it a secret from your children until you find some one that you want to be serious with? I have seen people take both of these paths. In my opinion, being open from the start is better. You may be opposed to this at first, but it really does ease them into the whole process.

When a parent keeps it from them and all of a sudden is like "WHAM! This is my new boyfriend/girlfriend.It's too much of a challenge for some kids to have to handle. Third, you're ready to begin to date again, so do it! How is that going to happen? Are people already trying to fix you up? You might already have a twinkle in your eye for someone? Would it be easier for you to sign up for an on-line dating website? This should be an exciting time for you. It might be scary to put yourself out there because it's been a while, but you'll get into the swing of things quickly.

It's good to get past the grief of your divorce, begin dating again and meet new people even if nothing develops romantically. You can never have too many friends to share time and conversation with.

Len Stauffenger's parents taught him life's simple wisdom. As a divorced dad, he wanted to share that simple wisdom with his girls. "Getting Over It: Wisdom for Divorced Parents," his book, is the solution. Len is an author, a Success Coach and an Attorney. http://www.wisdomfordivorcedparents.com